I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
