His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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