"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
