Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
