Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize