i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
