We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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