I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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