i already hear my dad disowning me
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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