You just made me feel so damn special
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
where does the pee come out of this thing
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
