If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
