Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
