Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Randomize