just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
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He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
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Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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