New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"