awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
