I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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