That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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