Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
