Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
We need to rekindle our bromance
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
