I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
