I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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