he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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