I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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