Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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