This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
