yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
