Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Farmville is her only friend.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I made him laugh his dick is mine
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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