We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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