I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
