sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Randomize