I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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