I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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