dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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