I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
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As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
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He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
i out mim tonsoeep
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