So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Randomize