Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
