wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.