Texts From Last Night

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  (315): View more from New York

  You smell like a Billy Joel song

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  (315): You smell like a Billy Joel song http://tfl.nu/8lk7
  Replies (7) Good night (811) Bad night (1998)
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  (631): View more from New York

  I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.

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  (631): I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches. http://tfl.nu/ic23
  Replies (28) Good night (539) Bad night (7051)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.

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  (908): So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all. http://tfl.nu/ms6m
  Replies (3) Good night (4438) Bad night (754)
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  (64): View more from New Zealand

  Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...

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  (64): Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon... http://tfl.nu/s0w2
  Replies (13) Good night (2482) Bad night (788)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.

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  (416): drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets. http://tfl.nu/drct
  Replies (7) Good night (3271) Bad night (734)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.

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  (913): I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom. http://tfl.nu/25xf
  Replies (3) Good night (1761) Bad night (550)
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.

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  (219): The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair. http://tfl.nu/a313
  Replies (2) Good night (813) Bad night (1586)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think

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  (732): because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think http://tfl.nu/340q
  Replies (8) Good night (1662) Bad night (566)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?

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  (303): I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream? http://tfl.nu/tu1k
  Replies (13) Good night (574) Bad night (1572)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die

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  (703): No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die http://tfl.nu/xp9d
  Replies (3) Good night (563) Bad night (1482)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.

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  (970): We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest. http://tfl.nu/w1i7
  Replies (16) Good night (2541) Bad night (645)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.

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  (907): Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig. http://tfl.nu/jc5y
  Replies (6) Good night (936) Bad night (877)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.

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  (312): i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me. http://tfl.nu/c5n9
  Replies (3) Good night (1679) Bad night (308)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?

  (540): View more from Virginia

  THATS VERY WEIRD

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  (304): Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs? (540): THATS VERY WEIRD http://tfl.nu/x698
  Replies (5) Good night (556) Bad night (268)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  you are like the bill nye of illicit activities

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  (512): you are like the bill nye of illicit activities http://tfl.nu/fr89
  Replies (1) Good night (491) Bad night (156)

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