Can Purell be used as lube?
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
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