Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize