he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
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