Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
