I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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