he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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