thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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