first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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