If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
