i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
