I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
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i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
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i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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