You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
as a side note pls kill me
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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