sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
